|
|
Post by William the Bloody on Nov 14, 2005 12:31:41 GMT -5
Let's get to it, shall we?
|
|
|
|
Post by Karen on Nov 14, 2005 15:46:24 GMT -5
#rofl1##rofl1##rofl1#
|
|
|
|
Post by Spaced Out Looney on Nov 14, 2005 15:51:29 GMT -5
 Wipes away a tear. These just keep getting better and better, Spring. You should check your own finger for a splinter. I'm worried about you. Poor woobie. #comfort# |
|
|
|
Post by Lola m on Nov 14, 2005 16:46:14 GMT -5
Ah, Spring does it again!
**snicker**
**snicker, snicker**
**snicker, snicker, snicker**
**snicker, snort, snort**
So, I'm sensing some kind of theme here . . . some kind of issue . . . some kind of suspicion on your part. And frankly, I'm wounded. Yes, a little bit hurt inside.
**sniffles slightly into lovely lace hanky**
Oh, look! Isn't that Monnie over there?
**points behind Spring, grabs James and runs while Spring is looking around, all the while still giggling over lines like: "Reminding me of his finger weapon, the head of the item suddenly pops out and forward, like . . . the head of something that suddenly pops out and forward." ** ;D
Brava, Spring! Brava! #claps#
|
|
|
|
Post by Squeemonster on Nov 14, 2005 19:43:30 GMT -5
Spring . . . dude . . . you've got serious issues.  #rofl1# #rofl2# #rofl1# #rofl2# #rofl1# #clap# These just keep getting better and better, Spring! I loved every single bit of this ;D. I especially love the way you seem to be telling the story from the point of view and naivete of a 12 year old--which, coming from you, really is no surprise at all. Good work! ;D  #clap# |
|
|
|
Post by SpringSummers on Nov 15, 2005 7:55:16 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by SpringSummers on Nov 15, 2005 7:57:51 GMT -5
Wipes away a tear. These just keep getting better and better, Spring. Thanks, Liz. These are much simpler than my analyses, but in fact, cause me more writer's anxiety after-the-fact, as I'm just not as confident, going for the funny. The splinter is in my wounded heart!  |
|
|
|
Post by SpringSummers on Nov 15, 2005 7:59:07 GMT -5
Ah, Spring does it again! **snicker** **snicker, snicker** **snicker, snicker, snicker** **snicker, snort, snort** So, I'm sensing some kind of theme here . . . some kind of issue . . . some kind of suspicion on your part. And frankly, I'm wounded. Yes, a little bit hurt inside. **sniffles slightly into lovely lace hanky** Oh, look! Isn't that Monnie over there? **points behind Spring, grabs James and runs while Spring is looking around, all the while still giggling over lines like: "Reminding me of his finger weapon, the head of the item suddenly pops out and forward, like . . . the head of something that suddenly pops out and forward." ** ;D Aha! I knew it! Stay away from Randy!! Thanks, Lola. Glad you got some snortles. |
|
|
|
Post by SpringSummers on Nov 15, 2005 8:01:57 GMT -5
Spring . . . dude . . . you've got serious issues. Right. I'm deluded! I should trust you with James, right?? WRONG!! I'm on to your tricks. I am glad you realize how innocent I am. And thanks for the feedback, Monnie. I make myself laugh when I write these, but I'm never sure it'll transfer. |
|
|
|
Post by Onjel on Nov 15, 2005 9:33:13 GMT -5
Spring . . . dude . . . you've got serious issues. Right. I'm deluded! I should trust you with James, right?? WRONG!! I'm on to your tricks. I am glad you realize how innocent I am. And thanks for the feedback, Monnie. I make myself laugh when I write these, but I'm never sure it'll transfer. It transfers! Magnificent, Spring! Your latest brought a chuckle and a guffaw to my lips today. Both were sorely needed and I thank you for them. Bravo! |
|
|
|
Post by Anne, Old S'cubie Cat on Nov 15, 2005 9:46:17 GMT -5
I am reduced to burbling #rofl1# incoherency before the wit and wisdom that is Spring Summers. That was a wonderful review, better than the actual show.
Is this just me? I thought JM looked as if he'd been filmed standing in a hole, to make Clark look taller. JM apparently projects "tall". What an actor!
|
|
|
|
Post by Spaced Out Looney on Nov 15, 2005 14:03:21 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by SpringSummers on Nov 15, 2005 14:41:12 GMT -5
I am reduced to burbling  incoherency before the wit and wisdom that is Spring Summers. That was a wonderful review, better than the actual show. Is this just me? I thought JM looked as if he'd been filmed standing in a hole, to make Clark look taller. JM apparently projects "tall". What an actor! Thanks, Anne. Glad I gave you some chuckles.  James looked just as short around Marc Blucas I think, but we saw him mostly with Buffy, and Spike was quite a lot taller than her, so - with Smallville almost all Milton's scenes have been with Clark, so I think that's making a difference. |
|
|
|
Post by Spaced Out Looney on Nov 16, 2005 8:22:13 GMT -5
TWOP Recap of JM's scenes. Central Kansas University: The community college where you get two-for-one classes on Wednesdays when you bring a coupon. Professor SoFine lectures with some slides. "Brutus and Caesar," he says. "Jesus and Judas." Is that...historical figures that have been used as the basis for too many mini-series? "What happened?" SoFine asks. Dude, I have no idea. I was just checking my text messages. Aren't you the History teacher? Clark sits in class in his red t-shirt, which seems a bit underdressed, as SoFine lectures that if history teaches us anything, it's that even the most powerful men can be betrayed by those they love most. SoFine says the reason we see so much betrayal in history is simple: duplicity is human nature. The buzzer sounds, signaling that the class is over. Dammit! Betrayed by Father Time again! SoFine asks if the classes are getting shorter or if it's just him. Nope, SoFine is the short one. Everyone clears out of class, including SoFine, who takes his briefcase and exits. Clark notices a bookbag that somebody left behind. He picks it up, and a green Kryptonite rock rolls out from under it. Piercing sounds play as Clark backs away. The overhead projector comes on. Clark looks to the screen, but the words are blurry. Clark tries to focus. The screen reads, "I KNOW HOW TO KILL YOU." On, this must be a slide for Econ class. The boredom will kill you. Clark blinks. The tension! It's killer!
Clark rushes outside as dramatic music tries to punch up the scene. SoFine sees Clark walking by a Student Union booth and asks if everything is all right: "You look a little stressed out." Clark says that something really weird happened after class. He read. And then he comprehended. It was trippy. Clark says that, yesterday, a truck tried to run him off the road. "It wasn't black, was it?" SoFine asks. Why's it gotta be a black truck, huh, professor? This institution is so racist! SoFine says he thinks the same truck is following him. Only the one following him is full of Buffy nuts. Clark asks whether he knows who might be responsible. SoFine says that they've been fishing in dangerous waters, and that maybe the shark is getting testy. "Lex?" Clark asks. Well, Lex does get testes. SoFine says he never thought Lex would take things this far. SoFine apologizes for getting Clark pulled into this. Clark plans to go barge into Lex's house for the umpteenth time to accuse him of something on no evidence. Right on, Clark. You go do that. SoFine tells Clark not to be so hasty; he wants to make sure it's Lex first. He says he jotted down the license plate on the truck. He asks if Clark knows someone who can look up the plates for a registration. So, SoFine is this master researcher with all these great resources to dig into major dirt, but he doesn't have anyone that can do a simple AutoTrack for him? I smell set-up. Clark says that his friend Chloe can do it. Hell, she could do it as a freshman in high school. SoFine says he'll check with campus security to see if they've spotted the truck. He tells Clark to remember that, whatever happens, they're in this together. Clark looks a tiny bit less worried.
*****
Central Kansas State. Clark wanders past some students into the lecture hall where Professor SoFine has just finished his lecture, "Lex Luthor is a very, very bad man!" SoFine says he wondered if Clark had forgotten about him. Fresh! He asks if Clark is all right. Clark, sweaty, says he's not. He tells SoFine that Chloe and his parents are in on it. Also? CBS News. Clark asks whether SoFine got any information about the truck from campus security. He reminds SoFine about their earlier conversation. "Clark. I haven't seen you in over a week," SoFine says. Clark is looking pretty awful. "I had a class, but you weren't in it," SoFine says dismissively. SoFine, who keeps finding variations on touching Clark's shoulder, says that he's got a faculty meeting, but will excuse himself if Clark will wait in his office. "Whatever's happening, we're in this together," SoFine says.
****
"Clark!" someone yells. It's Marsters! Er, "SoFine"! And he's pissed! But he reins it in and simply says, "You don't want to do that." I know we've all fantasized about it, but dammit, he's right. Clark drops Lana. "Trust me," SoFine says. Clark, in tears, says he can't trust anyone anymore. Trust me, Clark. I'll tell you when you're being a Big, Dumb Asshat. Clark tries to zip to SoFine, but SoFine is zip-enabled, too. He superzips across the room, to Clark's surprise. Holy bejeezus! Clark, looking more haggard by the second, asks if SoFine is one of Lex's experiments. SoFine says he's not. He's a friend, and if Clark hurts Lana, it'll destroy him. Clark thinks about that for a minute. No, he doesn't! He swings and cracks SoFine right across the jaw, launching him thirty feet across the room. So much for empathy. SoFine crashes into a table more expensive than his teaching salary. He gets up in some sort of CGI slow motion and fire-eyejaculates at Clark. My goodness! The eyejaculate gets Clark right in the chest, which I guess is kink, and throws him back. SoFine is right there, zipping over to straddle Clark and hold him down. Clark asks, "What the hell are you?" SoFine says he's a Kryptonian, just like Clark. But shorter and skinnier. He got the shit end of the Kryptonian gene pool. And he never leaves home without the Kryptonian Express Card. It looks like a big-ass needle plunger, though. "And I'm sorry," SoFine says as he plunges this ugly gadget right into Clark's neck. "This is really gonna hurt," SoFine adds. Clark screams as the thing screeches. A red light on the bulbous tip goes off (and no, this scene cannot be any gayer, so stop asking). In it is a floating splinter. Not beads or Astroglide? SoFine tells "Kal-El" that he'll be all right. "Lana?" we hear someone call out. It's Lex. SoFine zips out of the scene before he can be seen. And of course Lex has no surveillance cameras like every other billionaire does. "Lana," Clark says, sadly.
*****
The Barnness of Kryptonconferencing. SoFine is waiting for Clark in the loft. SoFine asks "Kal-El" how he's feeling. "So I didn't imagine that part," Clark guesses. Clark says he thought he was the last son of Krypton, but "you people keep popping up." It's like relatives when you're rich, yo. Mo' money, mo' problems, Kal. SoFine chuckles. He says that a superior civilization is hard to eradicate. Clark asks why he's there. SoFine says it's to help stop what's coming. Uh...what is coming? SoFine is also there to help Clark walk the path of the True Kryptonian. For one thing, stop fucking lying all the time. Clark says he's not interested in being "superior." SoFine asks Clark why he trusts humans more than his own people. Clark says that he's going by what he's seen. SoFine suggests looking closer. Clark asks why SoFine posed as his professor. SoFine asks why Clark keeps his secret, even from the woman he loves. SoFine says he had to observe Clark to see how influenced he'd been by "these...humans." Clark says that SoFine says it like it's a bad thing. SoFine says that's what he's seen. He says that humans show promise, but that they're still duplicitous. Clark says that they can be petty and dishonest, but also honest and loyal and protective. Even to someone from another planet. So it's a wash, then? "Kal-El," SoFine tries to reason. "My name is Clark," says Clark. And he's no Earl. Clark lectures that he'll always believe in his friends and family. SoFine hopes that trust isn't misplaced. He tells Clark that he knows where to find SoFine when he's ready to accept the truth. The righteous truth! Clark, looking up at the sky, sees clusters of stars.
SoFine's at the spaceship hangar. He holds up the silver Kryptonite. It seems to merge with his hand and fall into his flesh. He drops it, and it's just a plain black rock. Well, that's a neat trick, then.
|
|
|
|
Post by Lynn on Nov 16, 2005 10:40:23 GMT -5
Spring I think I solved the writer/producer problem on this show. Hire you!
I laughed all through your review, you genius.
Somewhere someone wrote that James could make you believe he was seducing a concrete block. I still have hope
|
|
#clap#
These just keep getting better and better, Spring! I loved every single bit of this ;D. I especially love the way you seem to be telling the story from the point of view and naivete of a 12 year old--which, coming from you, really is no surprise at all. Good work! ;D 
