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Post by SpringSummers on Nov 28, 2009 22:22:12 GMT -5
Oh no. Just no. Jan is one of the good people in this world. Her kindness and loving nature shows through her family and lights the world around her. My prayers are with you all, most especially Jan. She brings such joy I am deeply saddened to hear this news. Give my best to Rich and everyone. I am sorry, Angelique. Keep us posted. Onjel Take good care of our Rich. Take good care of you.
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Post by SpringSummers on Nov 28, 2009 22:23:28 GMT -5
Dear S'cubies, Rich asked me to post and give you all an update on Jan's condition. At this point, we still don't know what type of cancer she has, but we do know it's cancer and it's very aggressive. She has been moved from the hospital and into a nursing home and is under hospice care right now. Jan is dying, and we don't know how much longer she will be with us. She has slept since she was moved to the home, and the expectation is that she probably will not come back up to the surface again. Thank you all for your kind thoughts and wishes. It means the world to all of us here. If you have any questions send me an IM and I'll try to answer best as I can.
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Post by rich on Nov 29, 2009 11:44:34 GMT -5
My Dearest S’cubes,
Jan passed away a few minutes before 1:00 AM, Saturday, November 28th. She died peacefully in her sleep. On the last day of her life she was surrounded by people who loved her: me, Jason and Angelique, her friends Kathy and Eric and their daughter Daphne, Kathy’s sister Anne and her husband Joe.
During our visit, I learned from the Jan’s doctor and the hospice nurse that she could leave us at any time. So I arraigned to have a cot placed in her room.
Jan and I spent that evening together, listening to her favorite music. I spoke to her and sang to her. I held her hand and stroked her hair. I told her I loved her and that I would be ok, that she could go if she wanted. We would all take care of each other and we would be ok. Then I kissed her and lay down to sleep.
Next I knew, all the lights were on and the room was full of people. Someone was gently shaking me and telling me that Jan had just died. I went over to her and began stroking her hair and speaking to her. People cleared out of the room. I spent a little while with her. Then I called Jason and Angelique. They came and we all said our goodbyes. Then we gathered her things and went home.
Saturday, Kathy, Jason, Angelique, and I worked on Jan’s obituary which will be in the next post after this along with a link to a slide show of pictures of Jan. In accordance with Jan’s wishes, she will be cremated Monday and her ashes placed in the alter at Christ Church, Montpelier. In spring we will bury her ashes in the church’s flower garden. Because of the holiday, it has been a little tough to get in touch with the right people to set a date for the memorial service. When I have a firm date, I will post it on the board.
Thank you all for all your love, prayers, good wishes and support. Jan was proud to be a S’cubie. She often bragged to people about all of you. I remember the first time she described you to me. She said that though you were all different, each and every one of you had “a shining heart”.
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Post by rich on Nov 29, 2009 11:45:50 GMT -5
Jan Armstrong, 68, of Montpelier, died in Woodbridge Nursing Home on November 28, 2009. She was born on July 24, 1941, in Litton, Mississippi, the daughter of James B and Ruth Springer Armstrong. Because her father was a sharecropper the family moved from place to place, finally settling in Owensboro, Kentucky, where Jan attended high school. At the age of nineteen Jan took off for New York City, where she made Greenwich Village her home. She studied acting at the HB Studio, supporting herself by working as a Kitty Girl at the Café Wha? and as an airline stewardess. Her involvement in the live music scene dates to this period, a passion she carried with her to the end of her life. In 1967 Jan moved to New London, Connecticut with her husband, Tim Bertram. After earning a master’s degree in psychology from Antioch University New England, she set up practice in Hartford as a counselor specializing in childhood and sexual abuse. An ardent and early member of the women’s movement, Jan was instrumental in establishing consciousness raising groups there; she also worked by night as a torch singer and performed for the Actor’s Attic Theater Company. It was in Hartford that she met Richard Cianci, the man with whom she was to live for 13 years, and who in 2003 became her husband. Jan conceived of a love for central Vermont while attending the Summer Writers’ Workshop at Goddard College. She moved to Montpelier in 1988, where she began a career as a graphic artist, her desktop publishing business eventually growing into Armstrong Webworks. Her quest for spiritual meaning led her down many paths; in 2000 she became an Oblate at St. Mary’s Convent in Peekskill, New York, spending the next three years organizing weekend retreats and managing their website. She also trained as a spiritual counselor in Pecos, New Mexico, and served for many years as an acolyte at Christ Church in Montpelier. Jan had a lifelong passion for fiber arts; she began as a quilter and ended up a spinner and a knitter. She continued her work as a performer with Lost Nation Theater, and took enormous pleasure in the friends she met in two online communities, The Soulful Spike Society, and Ravelry. Her friends and family were everything to her. Jan is survived by her husband, Richard Cianci, of Montpelier; her son Jason Bertram and his companion Angelique Robillard of Rocky Hill, Connecticut; her godson, Chris Bertram of Waterbury, Vermont; her brother and sister-in-law, Tom and Connie Armstrong of Orlinda, Tennessee; her sister-in-law Karen Leader, her husband Scott and their children Robert and Rachel, of North Las Vegas, Nevada; and many friends in Montpelier and beyond. Jan was predeceased by her mother and father, as well as by two brothers, Charles and Michael Armstrong. A memorial service commemorating Jan’s life will be held at Christ Episcopal Church in Montpelier on Friday, December 11 at 11:00 AM. In lieu of flowers, contributions in Jan’s memory may be made to Heifer International ( www.heifer.org.) The link to Jan's slideshow is here.
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Post by Julia, wrought iron-y on Nov 29, 2009 12:19:07 GMT -5
My Dearest S’cubes, Jan passed away a few minutes before 1:00 AM, Saturday, November 28th. She died peacefully in her sleep. On the last day of her life she was surrounded by people who loved her: me, Jason and Angelique, her friends Kathy and Eric and their daughter Daphne, Kathy’s sister Anne and her husband Joe. During our visit, I learned from the Jan’s doctor and the hospice nurse that she could leave us at any time. So I arraigned to have a cot placed in her room. Jan and I spent that evening together, listening to her favorite music. I spoke to her and sang to her. I held her hand and stroked her hair. I told her I loved her and that I would be ok, that she could go if she wanted. We would all take care of each other and we would be ok. Then I kissed her and lay down to sleep. Next I knew, all the lights were on and the room was full of people. Someone was gently shaking me and telling me that Jan had just died. I went over to her and began stroking her hair and speaking to her. People cleared out of the room. I spent a little while with her. Then I called Jason and Angelique. They came and we all said our goodbyes. Then we gathered her things and went home. Saturday, Kathy, Jason, Angelique, and I worked on Jan’s obituary which will be in the next post after this along with a link to a slide show of pictures of Jan. In accordance with Jan’s wishes, she will be cremated Monday and her ashes placed in the alter at Christ Church, Montpelier. In spring we will bury her ashes in the church’s flower garden. Because of the holiday, it has been a little tough to get in touch with the right people to set a date for the memorial service. When I have a firm date, I will post it on the board. Thank you all for all your love, prayers, good wishes and support. Jan was proud to be a S’cubie. She often bragged on you all to people. I remember the first time she described you to me. She said that that though you were all different, each and every one of you had “a shining heart”. rich, I can only hope that in some moment in our time together here I brought Jan one-tenth the joy and comfort and insight she gifted so freely to me. Love you both, and angelique and Jason. Julia, such a loss to us all
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Post by Onjel on Nov 29, 2009 12:22:38 GMT -5
Oh Rich, I am so sorry. It is good to know that she went peacefully, surrounded by people who loved her and whom she loved in return. You have all my sympathies and loving wishes for strength and peace now and in the days ahead. Jan really was a shining light in what can be a very dark world. She will be greatly missed by me and, I'm sure, everyone else whose life she touched. I know I will never forget her love of life and her kind, generous nature. Rest in peace, Jan, darling. Take care, Rich and please keep us posted.
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Post by Anne, Old S'cubie Cat on Nov 29, 2009 12:22:46 GMT -5
My Dearest S’cubes, Jan passed away a few minutes before 1:00 AM, Saturday, November 28th. She died peacefully in her sleep. On the last day of her life she was surrounded by people who loved her: me, Jason and Angelique, her friends Kathy and Eric and their daughter Daphne, Kathy’s sister Anne and her husband Joe. During our visit, I learned from the Jan’s doctor and the hospice nurse that she could leave us at any time. So I arraigned to have a cot placed in her room. Jan and I spent that evening together, listening to her favorite music. I spoke to her and sang to her. I held her hand and stroked her hair. I told her I loved her and that I would be ok, that she could go if she wanted. We would all take care of each other and we would be ok. Then I kissed her and lay down to sleep. Next I knew, all the lights were on and the room was full of people. Someone was gently shaking me and telling me that Jan had just died. I went over to her and began stroking her hair and speaking to her. People cleared out of the room. I spent a little while with her. Then I called Jason and Angelique. They came and we all said our goodbyes. Then we gathered her things and went home. Saturday, Kathy, Jason, Angelique, and I worked on Jan’s obituary which will be in the next post after this along with a link to a slide show of pictures of Jan. In accordance with Jan’s wishes, she will be cremated Monday and her ashes placed in the alter at Christ Church, Montpelier. In spring we will bury her ashes in the church’s flower garden. Because of the holiday, it has been a little tough to get in touch with the right people to set a date for the memorial service. When I have a firm date, I will post it on the board. Thank you all for all your love, prayers, good wishes and support. Jan was proud to be a S’cubie. She often bragged on you all to people. I remember the first time she described you to me. She said that that though you were all different, each and every one of you had “a shining heart”. rich, I can only hope that some moment in our time together here I brought Jan one-tenth the joy and comfort and insight she gifted so freely to me. Love you both, and angelique and Jason. Julia, such a loss to us all What Julia says goes for me too. I will especially miss Jan's mix of wisdom and humor. Peace, Mehitabel S'cubie, and love to all of you.
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Post by Rachael on Nov 29, 2009 12:34:40 GMT -5
I have no words better than Julia's, so I'll simply say she speaks for me, too. I'm glad I had the opportunity to meet Jan, and will miss her deeply.
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Post by SpringSummers on Nov 29, 2009 13:50:03 GMT -5
Beautiful pictures of an amazing lady. Wonderful job on the obit. I will miss Jan very much. FYI, all: There's a place on the web where you can light a virtual candle for someone. It's comforted me in the past. If you are interested, click on the pic below to be linked to the site: (URL = www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm?l=eng)
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Post by Queen E on Nov 29, 2009 15:02:27 GMT -5
I don't really know what to say, so I thought I'd just post Jan's yearbook profile, from way back when:
Position: Mehitabel S'cubie Joined: Jan 18, 2005 Location: Montpelier, Vermont Favorite Quote: MOST favorite is the whole monologue/commentary by Spike (in ep 2 of Angel) when he's up on the roof. But for one line it would have to be "And when I'm really good he gives me a cookie." Tho that may not be exact. She's talking to Wes about her relationship with Giles. ("Whenever Giles sends me on a mission, he always says 'please'. And afterwards I get a cookie.") Favorite Episode: "The Body." Least Favorite Episode: the one where the teacher is a big bug and Xander is in a cage as bug food. "Teacher's Pet." Favorite Non-Joss Show: "Hamish MacBeth." Favorite currently on-- "NYPD Blue", but it will be "Lost" in a few weeks. Ultimate Goal in Life: To have more of it.
It's the last line that gets me. She was an amazing woman who lived an amazing life. I'm happy I got a chance to know her.
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Post by Squeemonster on Nov 29, 2009 15:29:06 GMT -5
Beautifully written obituary, Rich.
I will miss Jan more than I can say. The effect she had on me and the way I view friendships, life, and how to live and enjoy life to the fullest was profound. I am a better person for having known her. This community is better for having her as a member of the family, and it will not be the same without her.
Much love to Rich, and Jason and Angelique and all of the rest of Jan's family and friends.
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Post by Pixi on Nov 29, 2009 16:57:58 GMT -5
Jan changed my life and means more to me than I can possibly say. I will miss her desperately. I'm so glad you had that last evening together and . . . . . . . .
I'm so. so sad. We are so much the lesser for losing such a bright, wonderful soul.
I will miss you so much Jan.
My deepest sympathies to you Rich.
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Post by Michelle on Nov 29, 2009 20:37:22 GMT -5
My life is better for knowing Jan. Even though we only met once, I instantly felt at home with her. I will never not miss her.
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Post by Lola m on Nov 29, 2009 20:46:50 GMT -5
Rich - sending you all our love!! I'm just so sad to hear this news, but also so very very happy that you had Jan in your life, that you were able to spend the time you did with her, take care of her, spend her last night with her. And I'm so glad we all got together in October and got to have fun and laugh and talk.
No one is really gone while they still live in other's hearts, so Jan will never really be gone ever.
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Post by Sara on Nov 29, 2009 22:31:57 GMT -5
Jan was one of the most generous people I've ever known--generous with her love, her spirit, her insight, her laughter, and her friendship. I believe it's how she became such an integral part of this community so quickly, and the reason why I feel--as I suspect most everyone else does--that while I've only known her a few years it feels like I've known her forever. She had such a gift for making the people in her circle feel loved and cherished for exactly who they are, offering understanding and compassion without judgment or censure. I feel incredibly blessed and privileged to have known you, Jan, and I will miss you dearly.
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